


5 things John grew to love because of Frank

by derenai



Category: Football RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-21
Updated: 2013-04-21
Packaged: 2017-12-09 02:25:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,688
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/768893
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/derenai/pseuds/derenai
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What the title says.</p>
            </blockquote>





	5 things John grew to love because of Frank

**Author's Note:**

> It's been a while. I'm facing a huge block right now and that's about everything I wrote for months so I hope it's not too bad.

  
1\. Reading  



  
John used to read before he met Frank but not much. He saw it as a way to spend time when travelling and nothing more so he rarely picked up a book at home. However he had soon understood that his view on the matter was not shared by Frank. His lover needed books. He needed this time away from reality, to live another life and forget football and everything it involved. At first, John was upset by this habit. They had so little time together; he couldn't comprehend why Frank chose to spend it with such a solitary activity. He did have time for John, of course, but whenever they shared a room before an away game, he picked up a book for at least an hour, leaving John bored and sullen. They fought about it a few times as John didn't understand why his lover couldn't take his mind off things with him instead of someone else's words. Then one day, Frank brought two books with him and offered one to John who took it reluctantly. And even if he was unwilling to admit it, one hour later he was the one having trouble to put his book aside.

Since then, it had become a ritual. They would sit on the bed, shoulder to shoulder, sometimes holding hands or Frank absentmindedly stroking his arm, and they would read for a while. From time to time, John would look up from the pages to watch his lover. He loved seeing how the words could make him frown or smile. If John had read the book before, he would try to guess which part was making him react. Sometimes, Frank would sit on his lap and John would hold the book they read together, deciding when to turn the page as he was the slower reader.

After a while, John needed these moments as much as Frank. He still didn't read much at home, though, because books had become associated with his lover in his mind. He loved the calm of this activity and the stories he lived in his head but most of all, he loved the intimacy he shared with Frank in these moments. And it had become as essential as everything else they did together.

 

  
2\. Badly cooked pasta  



  
Frank loved cooking. It wouldn't really be a problem for John, who appreciated good food but didn't enjoy preparing it, except that Frank wasn't what you could call a good cook. John had to admit that his lover had improved since the beginning of their relationship. He used to burn a non-negligible amount of meals at that time. Added to that were all the food that wasn't actually burned but wasn't edible either, despite John's good will. He had tried to persuade him to take courses yet the pain in Frank's eyes when he talked about it had convinced him to forget the idea. So John learned to pretend he was enjoying his meal.

The thing was: he loved watching Frank cooking. He had that concentrated look on his face and cut every ingredient as if the slightest irregularity in their shape would make the whole recipe fail. He had a way to move smoothly around the kitchen, knowing exactly what he needed and where it was. Watching him you could almost think he was a great cook. John himself, despite his numerous years of experience, fell for it from time to time and actually expected a delicious meal. Only there was always something that didn't quite go according to plan. It was something John couldn't comprehend because his lover did seem careful and hardworking. After a while he had stopped wondering, guessing it had to do with karma or another mystical force. He had even stopped trying to help by keeping a look at the time when Frank tried to cook pasta. No matter what he said they were always over-cooked. Badly cooked pasta used to be a crime in John's mind. With the years, he got used to the taste, along with all the other funny dishes Frank prepared. To be totally honest, he loved them, even missed them when he was away from his lover. They were part of Frank and he loved every single thing about this man.

 

  
3\. Hard training  



  
As a professional footballer, John loved training.  He loved to stretch his limits, to improve his physical condition as well as his technical skills in order to become a better player. Only sometimes, when his whole body ached and half the session was still to go, he wished he had chosen another career path. Frank had taught him not to regret his choice, though, and had provided him with a very good reason to enjoy these days when it seemed their coach's secret wish was to kill every one of them. After such sessions, they would make excuses to go to the apartment they had bought for times when they needed privacy. They didn't use it much, except for this ritual after hard training sessions, for fear of giving themselves away, yet every single moment they spent there was worth the spending.

As Frank would be too tired to cook, they would stop on the road to buy some take away, for which John's taste buds were grateful. They would eat then Frank would prepare a bath with scented salt. After these hours of hard work, John couldn't imagine a sensation more divine than that of Frank in his arms and warm water around him. They wouldn't usually talk, only relax and enjoy each other's presence. When the water got cold, they would go to the bedroom and Frank would massage John. And it felt like heaven, Frank's hands working magic on his sore muscles. Yet if John loved when his lover took care of him, he equally loved taking care of him, so they would exchange roles and John would try to be as skilled as Frank. Then they would lie together, sometimes fall asleep, sometimes make love, or sometimes talk for hours about everything and nothing. And it was their definition of a perfect afternoon.

 

  
4\. Sleepless nights  



  
No matter how long he'd been playing football professionally, John still had those nights before important games when he couldn't sleep. No matter how hard he tried to prevent it, his thoughts would always turn back to everything that depended on this match and what it would mean if he suddenly forgot how to play. Frank never had this kind of trouble. He seemed to fall asleep the second his head touched the pillow in any circumstances. A faculty that John deeply envied and found quite infuriating. He couldn't blame his lover, though. He used to stay awake to try and comfort him until he finally fell asleep but John had told him to stop. He didn't like his lover losing precious hours of rest because of him. Moreover these nights weren't as irritating as they used to be when he was young.

He would watch Frank sleeping, carving each detail of this image in his memory. He loved the peaceful look on his face and the perfect curves of his body. More often than not he would wonder what exceptionally good deed he had done in an anterior life to deserve such a special and gorgeous man. He was still amazed at how they clicked, at the deep understanding they had of each other and at how, despite the years, their love had never faded away but become stronger every day. He'd never imagined two people could share such a bond and he realized how lucky they were. Each moment they had together was a treasure.

These thoughts would always soothe him. After a while he would curl up against Frank, concentrate on the slight movement of his chest when he breathed, on the texture of his skin against his, and he would fall asleep.

  
5\. Himself  



  
It wasn't easy being a gay footballer. He'd been raised in an environment with a very strong and sacred conception of virility. Being gay didn't fit in this picture. He'd learned to hate what he was from the day he'd understood he was attracted to men. He'd try to deny it, to get it out of his system.  He'd developed his personality according to the stereotypes, hoping it would turn him into a real man. He'd slept with countless women, yet it only made him more ashamed every time he had to imagine they were men.

The loathing of his sexual orientation led to the hatred of his own self. It began on the pitch when he missed a goal, then when he missed a pass. Then it came during training, when he didn't master an exercise as well as he wanted to. Slowly it consumed him, until there wasn't a single thing about himself that he liked or was proud of. He'd thought he'd past the point of no return when he'd met Frank. They clicked almost instantly but Frank had needed all his patience to make John accept his feelings for him. John still remembered how scared he was, how he couldn't comprehend why Frank would like him, how he nearly destroyed everything because of his stubbornness and his self-hatred. Yet Frank had taught him that no love was evil. Day after day he had shown him that he was worth more that he thought, encouraged him to be himself. It was a hard work. John progressed with baby steps and the slightest thing could make him go a long way back. Yet Frank never gave up. John was still amazed at that thought, wondering what Frank could have loved in him back then, not totally sure why he loved him even now. Somehow, though, it didn't matter anymore. Those days were past. With his eyes, Frank told him he was the greatest person on Earth; with his hands, he worshiped his body and with his smile, he proved him he could make someone happy. Frank loved him. But more importantly, Frank had taught him how to love himself.


End file.
